Never betray “trust”, in relationships or leadership. It is the foundation on which these two are built. You can’t betray people’s trust and expect to keep their confidence.
As a matter of fact people can tolerate honest mistakes but when you betray their trust you might never be given a second chance.
And so one gains or loses trust when these are present or absent: competence, congruence and character.
People will trust you when you are good at your job, any job. When you are incompetent, you will eventually lose the trust of people. People follow people who are greater than themselves.
If what you say and do match, people will trust you. Your words and actions must be in sync. Often people don’t look at your mouth; they watch your feet, where you are going. You can’t make a promise and break it and smugly believe you can keep the confidence of men and women who have no price. You can’t shout “Be honesty” when you are living in the fat of the land, on the sweat that forms on the brows of the poor. You can’t have a covenant with the people and break it and expect to maintain their trust.
Character is everything for a leader; not reputation. Character, someone says, is “what you do when no one is watching you”; what the Angel’s will tell your Lord when you stand before His Throne. Character is integrity; it’s credibility. Pretension catches up with people; only true self lasts. “To thine own self be true”, Shakespeare warns.
A person of character is therefore “genuine” to him or herself; owes allegiance to conscience and the Lord; is consistent regardless of the situation; and exhibits trustworthiness in his dealings with people.
A person who understand leadership and the enormity of the responsibilities which come along with it, surrounds himself with men and women with values, conscience and principles. “Who you are, is who you attract”, is as true as the saying “birds of the same feather flock together”. You can’t be honest and attract dishonest people; the relationship would last longer. If it does, look at the values that bind them.
As important as leadership, so is followership. A leader is always looking for a “buy-in” from the followers. When the values of the leader are in sharp contradiction to that of the followers, the leader is bound to lose the support of the followers. If the relationship is sustained for long, then look at the values that sustain such a relationship. Often shared values. For true, the leader comes from the society and thus exhibits the values imbued and imbibed from it.
Of course, once in a while a leader comes on stage who breaks ranks from society because he or she disagrees with the values of that society. That’s when a revolution sets in because the society has a revolutionary leader.
As a country in transition, we owe it to posterity to set for ourselves higher values of character, congruence and competence. We must demand these from each and everyone and hold ourselves accountable for their exhibition in our lives and relationships with all others. This period is “our time in court” and we must “follow the current” as it serves.
“There is a tide in the affairs
Which, taken at the flood leads onto fortune
Omitted all the voyages if their lives are bound in shallow and in miseries
On such a full seas are we now afloot”
Fortune, they say, often knocks once. Men and women who understand this take advantage of it. Those who don’t, tarry and either allow the grass to grow under their feet or let the bus pass. We are at the crossroads. To exhibit values or not to exhibit…..
